hildeguardog's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Angst Anthem I used to mock people who felt they had this "fake", as I called it and thought it was, teenage depression thing. It is all too real and it's effecting me. And personally, I don't care if I should've used affect, instead of effect, and I'll never learn the rule for those two words and I'll never care enough to try. My life is one big mess right now, and I'm having trouble even thinking straight. My mom and dad have been throwing one big piss-fit since yesterday evening when I talked to them on the phone from Micah's house. I think I might have a job walking a dog at night but I'm too afraid to go over there. All this "anxiety" is making me not myself, even moreso this time. I can be really quiet at times, and really obnoxious at others, to the point where I'm know I'm making myself look/sound like an idiot, but I can't stop myself. John is home now, and maybe my knowing that he's home will change things for me. I guess it's time to admit that my newest fear is being alone. I wouldn't admit it wednesday, but I guess I would have ended up saying it sometime. 4:28 p.m. - Saturday, Oct. 11, 2003 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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