hildeguardog's Diaryland Diary



Today was rough: I couldn't stop thinking about Chris. Withdrawal from an infectious laugh can be fatal when the addiction isn't fed. I wonder if he knew what was happening when he let his eyelids fall for the last time.
Those thoughts and 5 hours of work left me short-tempered. I was angry when will didn't walk Hilde tonight. I told him to do it, and 20 minutes later the dog was in the yard-- not on a walk. Will saunters on downstairs, taking his goddamn time, and I yell at him because I'm very angry at this point. I walk out the door into the yard and find that Hilde has already moved her bowels all over the walkway. I walk back to the door and watch Will continue to dick around. Basically, Will retorts: "you can't trust me?" when I watch to see if he actually walks the dog. Trustisn't free, kid. You haven't earned it. Why should I trust you when you've lied about walking the dog in the past?
Scenario 2: Last night, I tell Aaron of how this dude at the Chase in Dominick's near our studio was hitting on me. I briefly describe the situation and Aaron says something to the effect of "not every gay guy is hitting on you, Scott." This is the first time I've ever mentioned a guy hitting on me. Gilbert from Starbucks? Chris Jackson? I know several gay people that don't hit on me. It's rare that gay guys hit on me. Why would he think that I think that every gay guy is hitting on me? What a fucker.
Scenario 3: Aaron talks of kids "trying to be black." I ask of his definition of black, and that most black people probably don't fit that description. He said he didn't want to talk about it.
Tim just got me high so I should be cool for the evening.

12:03 a.m. - Wednesday, Dec. 12, 2007


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