hildeguardog's Diaryland Diary

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Walking the thin line between here and out of control.

It's tough not being myself. I haven't smoked much weed over the past week and a half but by the looks of me you could say I've smoked myself stupid. I don't physically react quick enough and sometimes I'll trail off mid-sentence: side effects of having too much on my mind. I couldn't be happier with my girlfriend; I can never wait to see her again and I love making her laugh; there's some things I'm going through, though, that I'd rather deal with on my own.
I've made a lot of decisions in the thirteen or so years that I've been conscious of decision-making, some better than others-- I have a sneaky suspicion that some of the others may be catching up to me. I was selling trees for about a year, then one of the people I felt close to used my trust to block me from four hundred of my own dollars. That's one of many examples I could give that depict the way I learn thing: the hard way.
Some of the scenarios I go through could go under the category of "blessing in disguise". I haven't had to worry about the option of jail time the past couple of days.
I try my best not to complain about things but I've never been good with a full plate.

4:57 p.m. - Thursday, Jul. 05, 2007

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